Let There Be Lumos

2. "LOVE 2.017" - January 15, 2017

What I have learned in my fifteen months of marriage is simple: you need to have 10 senses instead of the standard 5 senses. You are seeing, smelling, hearing, touching and tasting for two: you and your spouse.

Here are the extra five senses that every spouse naturally acquires in addition to the five you were born with:

1. Observing: You have to not only look with your eyes, but also look with your heart. Is your partner hurting? Can you see it in their eyes? It is your job to recognize the emotions from happiness to pain and hope that your significant other is doing the same for you.

2. Sensing: Similar to the smell of a fire or the gas stove being left on, it is your responsibility to sense if something is off and your job to determine how to recalibrate back to center. 

3. Listening: Hearing is not enough. Period. You need to listen deeply to what the other partner is trying to saying. Even though you both speak the same language, it is easy for emotions to get lost in translation.

4. Feeling: Use your "I feel messages" instead of "I blame" statements. You both have feelings, you both love each other. Get your point across without trying to hurt the others' feelings, but don't be afraid if it happens. Simply re-explain your position and work toward a common understanding.

5. Swallowing: Get your head out of the gutter... swallowing is swallowing your pride and revealing your vulnerability unabashedly to your partner. My husband courted me with a "no bull shit, no games" approach, and it was like a breath of fresh air. We try to eliminate shame by letting there never be a breading ground for it between us. We value honesty, loyalty and integrity in all things. It is the best tasting medicine around. 

For better or worse, love evolves with each generation. We are in the year 2017 here, hence the title "LOVE 2.017." Whether that is on a personal note, on a societal level or as a species, we learn and adapt as we go. Even when days are their darkest, love always wins. 

My husband makes me better and want to be better simply by who he is and through the unwavering support that he gives me. I am grateful for his endless love everyday. 

1. "6 Degrees of Kevin Costner" - January 14, 2017

*Spoiler Alert*

Do you ever feel like you know someone or know a character but are slightly off? I am notorious for this and was slightly obsessed with IMDB for quite some time. 

Kevin Costner is one of my favorite actors, yet forever I got him confused with Kevin Bacon. Kevin Bacon was in several of my favorite movies, namely "Apollo 13." While Kevin Costner was in "Dances with Wolves," "Field of Dreams," and "Waterworld." Some of Costner's movies got more recognition than others, but to my 7 year old mind, finding the map on the little girl's back showing them how to get to "dry land" in Waterworld absolutely blew my mind. It was such a crazy surprise! 

With all that being said, when Kevin Costner and Bill Paxton got cast to play Devil Anse Hatfield and Randolph McCoy of the Hatfield McCoy Feud, I could not be more pumped. My sister and I represent the feud: my mom is a McCoy and my dad is a Hatfield.

It is probably one of the many reasons why I love history, movies and books so much. Start looking at the connections in Hollywood. You never know when they will connect to your own story. 

The "Costner" section will be devoted to my personal observations and associations.

All photos on this site were taken by Shantanu Starick as he has been travelling the world for his latest project, Pixel Trade.